This Thanksgiving week for me has been interesting, relaxing, and eye-opening. As many of you know, holidays are not quite what they "should" be for my family. My brother has been in prison for ten years, and since that first holiday without him, which was a Thanksgiving, the magic has left most of these annual celebrations. Also, yesterday would have been the birthday of a dear friend who passed away last year.
Last year, I would have looked at the situation a little differently, but the way I approached the week has helped me to realize the progress I have been making. There are so many stars in the darkness of my sky, and I can see them now. I am engaged to a beautiful man who loves me unconditionally. I got to spend a week with both chosen and given family and realize how truly lucky I am to have such grounding and supportive people in my life. I may have had my moments over the week, but I am okay. I can feel love. I can feel safety. I can feel, and that it so much more than I was capable of one year ago. I am thankful for the return of my ability to feel human.
I may be a day late, but I am thankful for the struggle that led me to this point in my life. I am thankful for being me. And while that may seem selfish, I have not been able to say that in a long time. I am beginning to love myself again, and to me, there is no better gift in the entire world.
Thank you all for continuing to be a part of the many journeys that make our lives both connected and interesting.