Impermanence

I'm starting to believe that "forever" doesn't exist. When I think back on all of the impermanent people and things, I start to fear that everything that I know right now is going to be the same. I will lose touch with people or just lose them. The entire scene will change over and over again. This may not sound like news to a lot of people, but something about it hits me in a way it never has before. It most likely has something to do with my going home for a few weeks. I know it's what I need right now, but that doesn't mean I'm not afraid. I'm afraid because I'm already feeling kind of alone where I am. I don't like this disconnected feeling that I keep having, but it's only in certain places that it happens. It's unfortunate that it has to be in my own home.

I picked up a letter that I had written several months ago. I knew exactly which angry letter it was. I didn't open it. I just tore it up and threw it away. It didn't matter anymore. Angry letters rarely do.

My mood is basically a heavy sigh. My current song is my nationals mix because that's one of the only things I can think about with just over a week to go and so much work to be done.

I don't know what else. I can't focus enough on writing. Balls.