The Reason

I'm sitting in Physics class, and I really don't want to be here. Of course, I haven't been paying attention at all, and every time I look at the Powerpoint, I start to wonder what it would be like to understand this material in the way the University expects me to.
I'm not worried. I know that I can learn the material by reading the textbook. I just wish I were better at the subject in general. I feel like a lousy scientist because of my passionate hatred for Physics, and I blame this hate on all of the teachers that I have ever had. I've never had a good Physics teacher. I've never had one that could make me care or understand enough to pretend to care. I do well, but that's only because I'm good at figuring stuff out on the spot. I can look at an equation and the numbers that I am given and make sense out of them because I know what's missing, and with a little luck, I can figure out how to find that missing component. That has nothing to do with Physics and everything to do with logic.
I believe that the real point of most of my required classes is to teach one how to navigate through the system--how to not only pass but excel in things that you technically aren't supposed to. And I'm okay with that.
This is a class that will never be important to me. It will be pretty useless for most of the people surrounding me as well since Physics majors take the Calculus-based class. Almost everyone here is pre-Health, and they couldn't think to make all of the examples relevant to the work we'll be doing. What about the resistance of human skin? What about electrical conduction in the nervous system? I'm sure there are many more cool examples that have never been explained to me, and maybe if they had been, I would have a different opinion.
Does that mean that I don't worry about it? Are you crazy? It's true that I'm not as obsessive when it comes to studying as most of my classmates, but I do well. Actually, I think I do so well because I have a good perspective. I don't drive myself insane with worrying, and I can be focused when it's necessary. (Well, right now my attention is not focused on this class because I know that I will not learn anything by paying attention. My time is better spent reflecting on this experience than putting myself through a torturously boring lecture whose benefit is negligible at best.)
Yet people are trying to force us premeds to care about this shit. Every doctor with whom I've conversed tells me that classes like O Chem, Physics, and Calculus serve no purpose in their respective disciplines. These classes exist to test us, and the test is so much more than one of intellectual ability. They test our ability to withstand the pressure, our ability to deal with the frustrations of balancing the conflicting elements of our hectic lives, our ability to submit to whatever demands they place in front of us--basically, our ability to learn for the sake of gaining knowledge itself because when you get into the roughest spots during these undergraduate years, you realize that that little enjoyment you may derive is the only thing saving you from slitting your throat or running away to join the circus. I do all of the shit that they want me to do because nothing is going to stand in the way of what I want to do. It's worth the price to pay for a meaningful life.