I ended up crying because of how you treated me tonight. I still really care about you as a friend, and I don't know why the fuck you are so personally affected by a decision that had nothing to do with that. The reason I did it was to save our friendship, which I've told you over and over again. You showed up at my show tonight, and I thought that meant we could start to work on things, but instead, you treated me like shit and knew how that would affect me. I can only hope that you didn't do this on purpose--come to my show just to fuck with me and make sure it would fail.
You still mean a lot to me. But I've come to a really difficult point right now. I feel used and manipulated, and I am deeply hurt by all of this.
"It's just drag. Life goes on."
You disrespected me tonight, and I'm not a scared little boy anymore, and if something like that ever happens again, I'm not afraid to have you escorted out. I don't want to be made to feel uncomfortable at my own event.
I've tried to talk to you personally about it, so I don't consider this a passive aggressive attempt. You refuse to talk to me, which I can only assume means that you have given up on our relationship. I will tell you right now that I have done no such thing. I'm incapable of being like that, even when I want to, even when it would be so much fucking easier to just not care.
I don't want to lose you, but there will come a point when I will decide that I must close that door, if nothing changes, in order to protect myself.
I hope you understand this, all of it.
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