Now that I have a spacebar, I can type ridiculously fast again, though I must say I was getting really good at hitting that little dot exactly in the middle of the two alt keys. You never know when a skill like that could come in handy...
The official festivities for Pittsburgh Pride have come to an end, though I'm still pretty overloaded with drag-related commitments for the remainder of the month. I'll be performing this Saturday, next Thursday and Friday, and July 1st. And for some reason, I decided it would be a good idea to do a hot spot on Friday. I suppose I thought that, even though I am already fucking swamped, not many people were going to jump on that, and although it's going to be a huge pain in the ass, it'll create less drama in the end if I just do it.
I don't know if I have processed everything completely yet. It all happened so quickly, and there was so much work to be done that I really didn't have a lot of time to think about what I was doing while I was actually doing it. And I'm not sure that I have that much time right now either, but I'm a little less overwhelmed than I was about a week ago. The boy band number went very well on stage, and aside from the adjustments I needed to make because of the stickiness of the stage in the beginning, I am extremely happy with how our side improved from the first time to the second. I have a lot of theories about why our side works well togther, and it is a combination of things, and the same is true about the other side. I'm speaking about sides in the number, of course, not in real life, in case anyone gets funny ideas about that. The whole number was well received, and I think we might see a lot of new faces at our next show, which is why I am getting a tad nervous about not knowing how much has been put into that show. I really want to get a jump on things so that we aren't always rushing to get things worked out a week or two before the show. I think that will come in the next few months as we wind down from pride, but it is going to take an initial push that might be unpleasant and exhausting.
It was ridiculous to see my name on that poster (which is now sitting in our living room) and to be on that stage. It wasn't the biggest crowd I've ever had, but it was probably the one that had the potential to be the most critical and least receptive to the idea of a drag king, especially one who identifies as a transman. And I literally saw their minds changing as the number progressed. I saw some heads explode, made some old lesbians blush, and definitely made an impression on Pittsburgh that day. Despite the change of plans and then the change back to the original plan, which probably freaked me out even more since I was already starting to get used to the idea of the first change of plans, I not only did what I needed to do, but did it without fear or hesitation. I don't think I stopped smiling for the rest of the day. Nothing was going to bring me down that day, and it was pretty sweet to have all these random people want to take pictures with you. I felt like a fucking rockstar. Someone came up to me after my performance and told me that I was just born to be an entertainer, and that really meant a lot to me. And I'm not sure where to go with that from here. It deserves more thought than I can give to it in one night.
The rest of Sunday was equally enjoyable. I showered quickly in order to remove random pieces of latex and extraneous patches of paint. Then it was off to Cattivo for food and beer and epic dancing. I'm not entirely sure how it was possible that I puked that night because I was just lying in bed when it hit me out of nowhere, but it does make sense given the amount of alcohol I drank and the rapidity with which it had been consumed. I've spent the last few days trying to get things in my life organized while also practicing for this weekend. I've really enjoyed that. These two days of practice have been some of the least stressful of all, and they've been pretty productive. I really hope we have a good turnout on Saturday because these performances are going to be awesome, and many of them are going to be on a different level than a lot of people are used to. I don't do very serious political things very often, but this is the perfect opportunity for me to use a cathartic drag performance as a political voice. I think, regardless of who you are, you're going to see a side of me that you've never known before. I really urge you to come (and to buy a cheap advance ticket from me!)
I really don't know what comes next. I've been busy living in the present for the last few months. That has both advantages and disadvantages.
I think my train of thought has crashed into a wall.
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